The song, “It’s The Same Old Song,” by the Four Tops, plays in my mind whenever I am reflecting on my self-inflicted crucifixion. I know the song is about a break-up, but the line, “it’s the same old song,” accurately represents the repeated stories I tell myself when upset about relationships or situations. You may be familiar with my same old song, a list of berated thoughts: not worthy enough, not smart enough, not beautiful enough, not articulate enough, not graceful enough and the list can go on. These beliefs can run deep for many of us. This faulty programming can keep people stuck in a fear-based mindset rooted in not having the power or worth to manifest our heart’s desires for a happy, joyful, and abundant life.
Even after 20+ years of doing my own healing work these beliefs still dance around in my mind. However, when I do go to this not so loving space of the inner critic it doesn’t have as much power to keep me stuck in suffering as in the past and that is thanks to having a sacred relationship with my soul sister, Lorri.
I have found our sacred relationships offers 6 keys: trust, compassion, self-acceptance, vulnerability, authenticity, and gratitude, which are imperative to healing misperceptions of our identity. Sacred relationships help us reclaim our Divine Sovereignty, because they help us see and know our Self Worth. The other person sees our Divinity and reflects it. In truth, our worth does not come from our worldly successes (having to prove ourselves.)
Just the other day, my dear friend and sacred sister, Lorri, and I were meeting with our assistant regarding an exciting business project. Our assistant was giving us necessary and helpful feedback to ensure the success of our project. After all, that was the point of us meeting. She began pointing out the technical issues on my end.
My heart sank and my mind quickly went into I am a screw up and a failure. These screaming judgments started making me feel overwhelmed and brought up deep fears of not being good or smart enough to do this project. Also, the schoolgirl in me surfaced as I thought that Lorri was going to scold me for messing up. Then she would never want to work with me again. She would abandon me because she couldn’t count on me.
Where was this story coming from?
Did Lorri iterate any of these harsh judgments to me? NO!!!
Did the assistant who was patiently helping me fix a technical problem say this to me? NO!!!
Lorri sat there in patience while our assistant was helping me to work out this glitch. Then she continued to sit with and hold me in compassion as I stated my overwhelming feelings. The space to authentically express myself was gifted by my dear soul sister and our assistant in a highly charged moment. It was a judgment free zone.
Their loving presence was medicine for my reactive mind stirred by long held fears and beliefs about myself. These judgments were not from Lorri or our assistant. They were all mine. My circus of craziness.
I hold this loving and nonjudgmental space for many others in my personal and professional life. Yet, the most difficult person for me to do it for is myself.
I am grateful for this experience and their compassionate hearts.
They were the presence of Love. The Love I am. They are. You are. We all are.
In my melt down, they held the higher vision….seeing my Divine Essence.
Lorri has been my weekly prayer partner and holding the high watch for me since May of 2016. She has intimately walked with me through the best and worst of times. We have built a sacred relationship with the above keys to help support us to heal the blocks keeping us from remembering our true essence (our Divine Worth.) She has helped me voice and learn how to let go my fears of rejection, abandonment, betrayal, and lack of worth. The beauty of this relationship is that it doesn’t end with us.
The dynamics of our loving connection extend into other relationships.
Our prayer partnership is answering my long-standing prayer to truly know myself as God created me. To truly know my essence is where I will find happiness.
This prayer from my heart is not only for me. It is for ALL of US!!!
May a sacred relationship bloom and cultivate in your life to help you truly know and embrace your essence.